“The Universe is My Community”

I am still here… been through alot of changes since my last post.  Our family moved from PA to Northern VA (right outside of the DC area) this past summer and I also lost my brother this past October after his 16 month battle with cancer.  Coming from a large, close family in PA, I left behind a daily connection with my family and recently have been aware of the notion of “community.”  As I reflected on the places I have lived and the communities I have been involved with both in those geographical areas as well as virtually, I heard LOUD and CLEAR, “The Universe is your community!”  I felt a wave of release and AHHHH, yes, that feels right!!!  After several waves of tears over a couple of days since this LOUD AHA moment, I recognize that as I stay in community with the Universe, I am connected on a daily basis to what is in resonance with me in that moment… and that I can connect with anyone that I desire through my strong energetic connection with the Universe, as we are all ONE!

I also became very aware of how communities can sometimes present artificial barriers and boundaries to use as protection from stepping out and just being MYSELF, regardless of the community I find myself in at that moment.  So, I recognize that as I am in community with the universe, that I release these constraining boundaries I sometimes feel within communities.

I feel so free!

My book is now available!

I did it!  I completed my book, “With Popsicles Anything is Possible: A Mother Recover’s from Her Children’s Diagnosis of Autism”

It is now available as an E-Book from my website.

I would love to get feedback, so please keep in touch with me!

In gratitude!

I love homework!

When Sammy was younger, during homework, he would often pace around the house saying phrases like, “It’s too hard!”, “I can’t do it!” and really get into a negative space.  He was very capable of doing the work, he just carried all this negative energy with the notion of homework.

Knowing the power of words, I would put up signs that said “Homework is easy!”, “Math is fun!”, etc… and sing it to him to break up all the heavy, negative energy he was experiencing.  We would often break into laughter and lighten the mood… sometimes we would run around the house to break up the heaviness as well!  Once we got past that wall of energy that was blocking him, he would ease through his homework.

He is now (in 8 days) 13 and in 7th grade… last night he was in his room and I stopped in to see what he was doing.  He was pacing around his bedroom talking to himself.  I asked him what he was doing and he said he was just giving himself a pep talk about his homework and how he was going to get it all done!

WOW – that was one of those moments as a parent where you just take a moment to enjoy the growth and expansion in your family!!  YEAH – he is using these tools for himself now!!!

I love to share these stories for others that are in those earlier years where you wonder – how will I get through another night of homework with my kid!  Continue to hold that positive space for them – they need us to do that until they can do it for themselves.  AHA MOMENT – isn’t this true of all of us.

Self Care: Knowing It vs Living It

Of course I KNOW that if I take care of myself, everyone else benefits.  This week I actually LIVED it, rather than just knew it.

At the end of last week, I knew I hit a new level of bottom for me.  Everything in my life felt LOUD and unsettled.  So, I made a conscious shift to put my entire focus on “filling up my cup” the following week.

I did many small things throughout this week for ME, but the BIG thing that I did was put the intention / awareness / attention / love / energy on ME!

Feels so incredibly good… I felt so much lighter and brighter and clear as the week progressed.

And, of course, my outer life has not changed at all.  I am still facing the same “stuff” every day, but today I am approaching it with ease and grace… and a smile on my face!

Today, I feel incredibly blessed and honored that I shifted to what this feels like rather then knowing what I was supposed to do (yuck, that feels so far removed now!).

Much love to everyone… I have ALOT to share today now that I am full!!!

The more I trust my instincts, the more I trust my instincts!

I have been getting feedback from Tommy’s school for a while now that he has been enamored with another student at school.  As time progressed, it became more intense, so discussion started with the staff about how to best manage both Tommy and the other student’s needs.  I love his school for this very reason, they always have each students needs as their primary concern and are open to looking at all potential ways to address their needs.

So, as I was having this discussion with the staff, I heard what they were saying about what this looked like at school – but my instincts kept telling me it wasn’t about the relationship between Tommy and this other student – but more about the sound or tone that the other student offered in Tommy’s presence.   My instinct kept growing stronger and stronger as I was listening to staff, so I offered this up to them.  I could almost hear the sigh of relief as they saw the situation differently.

Within a few days, the entire staff went from frustration to excitement as they provided Tommy with unlimited access to an electronic keyboard to create the sounds, tones and vibrations that were comforting to him.  Here is the miracle that came from following my instincts… they reported that rather than approaching the other student, Tommy is now asking for more access to the keyboard.

I still am amazed by how quickly things can shift when we listen to our instincts!

And, I am even more amazed and delighted at the new opportunities that are now opening up for Tommy and the staff as they explore his love for tones and vibrations!

 

Wayne Dyer’s Wise Words: Seven Steps for Overcoming Ego’s Hold on You

Forwarding this information from Wayne Dyer… I have found that being aware of each of these and making a choice to not engage with my ego free’s my energy up to do so many other creative fulfilling things!  I have also found that I have plenty of opportunity to practice

From Wayne Dyer

Here are seven suggestions to help you transcend ingrained ideas of self-importance. All of these are designed to help prevent you from falsely identifying with the self-important ego.

1. Stop being offended.

The behavior of others isn’t a reason to be immobilized. That which offends you only weakens you. If you’re looking for occasions to be offended, you’ll find them at every turn. This is your ego at work convincing you that the world shouldn’t be the way it is. But you can become an appreciator of life and match up with the universal Spirit of Creation. You can’t reach the power of intention by being offended. By all means, act to eradicate the horrors of the world, which emanate from massive ego identification, but stay in peace. As A Course in Miracles reminds us: Peace is of God, you who are part of God are not at home except in his peace. Being is of God, you who are part of God are not at home except in his peace. Being offended creates the same destructive energy that offended you in the first place and leads to attack, counterattack, and war.

2. Let go of your need to win.

Ego loves to divide us up into winners and losers. The pursuit of winning is a surefire means to avoid conscious contact with intention. Why? Because ultimately, winning is impossible all of the time. Someone out there will be faster, luckier, younger, stronger, and smarter-and back you’ll go to feeling worthless and insignificant.

You’re not your winnings or your victories. You may enjoy competing, and have fun in a world where winning is everything, but you don’t have to be there in your thoughts. There are no losers in a world where we all share the same energy source. All you can say on a given day is that you performed at a certain level in comparison to the levels of others on that day. But today is another day, with other competitors and new circumstances to consider. You’re still the infinite presence in a body that’s another day (or decade) older. Let go of needing to win by not agreeing that the opposite of winning is losing. That’s ego’s fear. If your body isn’t performing in a winning fashion on this day, it simply doesn’t matter when you aren’t identifying exclusively with your ego. Be the observer, noticing and enjoying it all without needing to win a trophy. Be at peace, and match up with the energy of intention. And ironically, although you’ll hardly notice it, more of those victories will show up in your life as you pursue them less.

3. Let go of your need to be right.

Ego is the source of a lot of conflict and dissension because it pushes you in the direction of making other people wrong. When you’re hostile, you’ve disconnected from the power of intention. The creative Spirit is kind, loving, and receptive; and free of anger, resentment, or bitterness. Letting go of your need to be right in your discussions and relationships is like saying to ego, I’m not a slave to you. I want to embrace kindness, and I reject your need to be right. In fact, I’m going to offer this person a chance to feel better by saying that she’s right, and thank her for pointing me in the direction of truth.

When you let go of the need to be right, you’re able to strengthen your connection to the power of intention. But keep in mind that ego is a determined combatant. I’ve seen people end otherwise beautiful relationships by sticking to their need to be right. I urge you to let go of this ego-driven need to be right by stopping yourself in the middle of an argument and asking yourself, Do I want to be right or be happy? When you choose the happy, loving, spiritual mood, your connection to intention is strengthened. These moments ultimately expand your new connection to the power of intention. The universal Source will begin to collaborate with you in creating the life you were intended to live.

4. Let go of your need to be superior.

True nobility isn’t about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be. Stay focused on your growth, with a constant awareness that no one on this planet is any better than anyone else. We all emanate from the same creative life force. We all have a mission to realize our intended essence; all that we need to fulfill our destiny is available to us. None of this is possible when you see yourself as superior to others. It’s an old saw, but nonetheless true: we are all equal in the eyes of God. Let go of your need to feel superior by seeing the unfolding of God in everyone. Don’t assess others on the basis of their appearance, achievements, possessions, and other indices of ego. When you project feelings of superiority that’s what you get back, leading to resentments and ultimately hostile feelings. These feelings become the vehicle that takes you farther away from intention. A Course in Miracles addresses this need to be special and superior: Special ness always makes comparisons. It is established by a lack seen in another, and maintained by searching for, and keeping clear in sight, all lacks it can perceive.

5. Let go of your need to have more.

The mantra of ego is more. It’s never satisfied. No matter how much you achieve or acquire, your ego will insist that it isn’t enough. You’ll find yourself in a perpetual state of striving, and eliminate the possibility of ever arriving. Yet in reality you’ve already arrived, and how you choose to use this present moment of your life is your choice. Ironically, when you stop needing more, more of what you desire seems to arrive in your life. Since you’re detached from the need for it, you find it easier to pass it along to others, because you realize how little you need in order to be satisfied and at peace.

The universal Source is content with itself, constantly expanding and creating new life, never trying to hold on to its creations for its own selfish means. It creates and lets go. As you let go of ego’s need to have more, you unify with that Source. You create, attract to yourself, and let it go, never demanding that more come your way. As an appreciator of all that shows up, you learn the powerful lesson St.Francis of Assisi taught:”…it is in giving that we receive.” By allowing abundance to flow to and through you, you match up with your Source and guarantee that this energy will continue to flow.

6. Let go of identifying yourself on the basis of your achievements.

This may be a difficult concept if you think you are your achievements. God writes all the music, God sings all the songs, God builds all the buildings, God is the source of all your achievements. I can hear your ego loudly protesting. Nevertheless, stay tuned to this idea. All emanates from Source! You and that Source are one! You’re not this body and its accomplishments. You are the observer. Notice it all; and be grateful for the abilities you’ve accumulated. But give all the credit to the power of intention, which brought you into existence and which you’re a materialized part of. The less you need to take credit for your achievements and the more connected you stay to the seven faces of intention, the more you’re free to achieve, and the more will show up for you. It’s when you attach yourself to those achievements and believe that you alone are doing all of those things that you leave the peace and the gratitude of your Source.

7. Let go of your reputation.

Your reputation is not located in you. It resides in the minds of others. Therefore, you have no control over it at all. If you speak to 30 people, you will have 30 reputations. Connecting to intention means listening to your heart and conducting yourself based on what your inner voice tells you is your purpose here. If you’re overly concerned with how you’re going to be perceived by everyone, then you’ve disconnected yourself from intention and allowed the opinions of others to guide you. This is your ego at work. It’s an illusion that stands between you and the power of intention. There’s nothing you can’t do, unless you disconnect from the power source and become convinced that your purpose is to prove to others how masterful and superior you are and spend your energy attempting to win a giant reputation among other egos. Do what you do because your inner voice always connected to and grateful to your Source-so directs you. Stay on purpose, detach from outcome, and take responsibility for what does reside in you: your character. Leave your reputation for others to debate; it has nothing to do with you. Or as a book title says: What You Think of Me Is None of My Business!

Autism? or Awesomism? There is a world of difference!

As a parent I remember when I came to the MOMENT where I saw a CHOICE… and an OPPORTUNITY to explore the difference between Autism and Awesomism.  As a mom who has been mentored by Suzy Miller for several years now, I have had a profound shift in my perspective and no longer see autism in my child – only awesomism!

Here are just a few ways that I now see the difference…

THE LABEL

Autism: Feels heavy, a burden and limiting to a family’s lifestyle.

Awesomism: Brings about curiosity, surprise and delight as new possibilities present themselves.  I have witnessed that my kids use parts of their brains that I don’t have access too, are right-brain dominant and have wide-open sensory systems (five senses and beyond).  I am now intrigued and continue to learn from them as they approach life from their own unique vantage point.  We all learn from each other everyday as new possibilities present themselves when judgment is removed.

BEHAVIORS

Autism:  Can be exhausting and stressful when living with a child’s autistic behaviors.

Awesomism:  An opportunity to reflect on how I can learn about myself from my child’s behavior.   I have learned that these highly sensitive kids mirror their environment.  There is an opportunity for me to restrain from judging my child’s behavior first and to consider how this behavior is also part of my experience.  I have experienced MANY times that as I do this and find the opportunity for me to grow and shift, my child’s behavior can’t help but shift as well.

COMMUNICATING WITH WORDS

Autism: Disappointment that comes when you can’t get your child to speak (vocally).

Awesomism:  Again, another opportunity to learn about how to connect with my child without using vocal words.  I have found that there are so many possibilities that show up when we take the pressure off the child and ourselves to communicate vocally – and start to connect and build a relationship with them on the many other levels that become available.  For me, once I did this and bridged the gap and met my child where he was, the words began to naturally follow!

If this intrigues you in anyway… if you feel perked up by this in anyway, I encourage you to consider the Empowered Parent Program with Suzy Miller.  It is not only possible, but incredibly magical and enjoyable to shift into a new relationship with your family!

“My Kids Are Going to Be Fine”

During the holiday, I had a heart-to-heart with my brother as I reflected on the past year and what I envision for the new year as I step more and more into all that I AM!  I am so excited for the new year!

My family has seen how much I have sacrificed myself over the years and so when I found myself naturally saying, “My Kids Are Going to Be Fine”, my brother gave me a big hug and said that is the best thing he has heard in a long time and that it made his holiday!

I didn’t even realize how “BIG” that statement was until he acknowledged it.

YEAH, my kids are going to be fine!!!

FWIW – Wikipedia defines fine as “attractive, of high quality”

I AM in such a wonderful space where I can truly love and reveal all aspects of myself (feels like coming home) KNOWING this allows my kids to be all that they are (at home with themselves).

Oh, happy day, happy year, happy decade, happy life

The Grinch that Stole Christmas!

Tommy has been watching “The Grinch that Stole Christmas” alot this season.  He has brought us together as a family to sit and watch it with him.  We’ve had some very connected family moments watching this with him.

During a meditation the other day, I had a series of visual images that brought to light his connection with this movie.

I was able to see that the Grinch is autism.

The Grinch (aka autism) came through one night and stole all the Who-ville family’s  presents, decorations and delicacies.

But, the next morning, love and light prevailed as they gathered to sing and celebrate despite the Grinch (aka autism) having coming thru the night.

As the Grinch (aka autism) witnessed this gathering of love and light, his heart expanded three sizes!

The Grinch (aka autism) transformed in that moment.

I got to see the power we have when we gather and collect our love and light.

Autism can not exist where there is a gathering of love and light.

That is why I am so passionate about connecting with other families!

**As a side, there is another opportunity here for a perspective shift.  The behavior of watching a video over and over again can be frustrating to a family.  For me, these are all opportunities to shift perspective and see the behavior with new eyes.  In this case, taking a moment to gain wisdom from the message being communicated through this video.  Once that message is received, it has been my experience that the child no longer has the need to continue to replay the same video.   Put simply, ‘behaviors’ are just a form of communication, and they will continue until the message is received.

Least vs Most Restrictive… A Perspective Shift!

Had yet another perspective shift over the weekend… parents sometimes get stuck on least restrictive vs most restrictive school placements. I found that where the educational/legal system might call my son Tommy’s placement as most restrictive, he is actually in the least restrictive environment because he is able to be truly himself… and as a result is stepping into himself more and more.

Another example of how labels can inhibit us parents from letting our kids shine!